Why, Saucony, why?

Dear Saucony,

We've been together a while now. Pretty much since I started running in high school. You kept me company with that one version of the Jazz for years. I thought I was going to weep when you discontinued it. Then I started trail running. I dabbled in a pair of Montrails, but after a year or so, you came out with your Omni TR shoes and I was back in Sauconys. I love those shoes. They work well for me on pavement and on trails. I bought two pairs at once a while back, so much did I love them. 

And guess what? You're discontinuing them YET AGAIN!! Saucony, why must you do this to me? I don't want to get used to another pair of shoes. Today I called all over town and looked a whole bunch online and guess what? If I were a size 6 or size 11, I'd have no problem finding them. But being what looks to be one of the most popular shoe sizes ever, it's impossible to find them. 

You know what? This wouldn't sting quite so much if I'd had some kind of warning it was coming-- I would probably have gone out and bought as many pairs as I could afford. But alas and alack, Saucony, you have left me in the lurch. 

Today, I had to buy a pair of shoes you named Xodus. 

First, that name makes me feel like I should be leading packs of oppressed runners out of the woods. I'm not that fast (or perhaps so chosen), Saucony! 

Second, YOU SPELLED THE WORD WRONG. I can't even tell you how much I hate when companies who have plenty of money don't hire English majors to spell-check their publications. What else are my skills good for?? 

Third, there are latitude, longitude and elevation markings on my shoes. It says my shoes are at 6193.6 meters. (For the metrically challenged, that's 20,320 feet.) This is the exact height of Mt. Denali.  (Mere coincidence or psychic phenomenon?) While I find Mt. Denali fascinating and would someday like to climb it (after I learn to be a mountaineer, of course), I do not imagine that I will be RUNNING to the top. Furthermore, at this present moment, my shoes are sitting next to me in Richmond, California, where the elevation might be around 5 feet (1.524 m). How would I run if my shoes were at 6,193.6 m (20,320 feet)? 

Fourth, if you were going to go biblical with your name, why on earth did you say the shoes were at the same height as Mt. Denali? I think that Mt. Ararat (elevation: 5,165 m or 16,946 ft) would have been a more consistent thematic choice.  

Finally, your color choice is highly confusing. My new shoes are black with small bits of light blue. I mean, ok, Saucony, but you're making RUNNING SHOES. These look a little too much like they're trying to be street shoes. They don't need to match my Ann Klein black slacks. However, I am looking forward to seeing the contrast when I add my Dirty Girl hot-pink gaiters...

I hope you named your shoes Xodus because they are going to be so comfortable I'm going to keep running and running and running... but hopefully not to a new land. I like where I live. 

Well Saucony, that's about it for me. Take care and STOP DISCONTINUING THE SHOES I LOVE!!!

Con cariño,

Victoria

p.s. In case you were toying with this biblical theme for your trail running line, I do not recommend that you name your next brand of shoes Leviticus. It lacks a certain je ne sais quoi.